OK, I used to be a paying member of E*Harmony (pathetic and lame, I know), and they sent me an email today telling me that I was violating an agreement we apparently made sometime back. I don't remember shaking anybody's hand, but OK. I had posted my email address and they told me to take it down. So I took it down, no problem. Then I sat down and wrote them this invigorating (for me) little email: Dear The E*Harmony Team, I did not know that I was violating the end user agreement, or whatever it was called by posting my email. Your company has already made a decent amount of money from me, although it's probably not that large an amount compared to myriad other poor customers your company keeps stringing along who are in a condition similar to mine. I understand you are a commercial enterprise and you certainly deserve to be paid for the premium information which you have scientifically gathered. But, here’s the twist… (with a touch of sarcasm) JAMIE: “I ALREADY GAVE YOU MY MONEY!!!” You guys are like the character Newman from Seinfeld said as he worked his greedy little fingers, ‘…the post office controls—information!’ If you are a Microsoft server and you are reading this, you probably didn’t get that, but I continue… I have removed the links for which I have been called in question, but first I must ask you, if you are indeed a real person and not some server-generated message, (which I suspect b/c of the random nature of the passage selection) if YOU actually take a large chunk of YOUR valuable time to sift through ridiculous EULAs multiple times in order to decipher the steaming piles of legalese crap. Oh, and about the stringing along... I've had my email address posted for, like, two years now. Why is it that just now I have been asked to remove it? Could it possibly be that I'm to first be plied with a staggering amount of follow-up email solicitations to rejoin before being 'called on the carpet?' Sounds like some sort of unhealthy relationship that can sometimes happen between two people when one person loves the other one so much they try to dominate and subjugate the other and then the other person tries to gain the advantage by taking…(That could go on for a while so I’ll stop there.) Finally, in the likely case that I'm talking to a machine, hello there little server, it's nice to meet you, I'm a real, actual person with feelings, who's just wasted some more time writing this heartfelt email to a MACHINE. In the case that I have the unlikely good fortune of addressing a real, actual person with feelings, I would be most delighted if you would deign to reply to my rant with a sincere message of more than two sentences sandwiched into a ridiculously cold form email. (URGENT MESSAGE my foot, URGENT to rake in the bucks is more like it) Thanks for your E*indulgence and I would like to wish you a wonderful holiday season. Most Sincerely, Jamie (a real, living, breathing person with feelings) Edit: I tweaked the part 'when one person [loves the other one so much they try] to dominate and...' (that part in italics wasn't in the email I sent. | 
